Heteronormativity ahoy

[nmg]

Scene: I was taking the garklet for a haircut, and we happened to pass a church that was ringing for matins. He asked why the bell was ringing, and misheard 'matins' as the name of one of his friends who moved to Cambridge last year (who I shall refer to as M). The important thing to note is that M is the child of a lesbian couple.

garklet:

Where M?

nmg:

M's in Cambridge.

garklet:

Why M in Cambridge?

nmg:

Because his mummies got jobs in Cambridge.

garklet:

What about him daddy?

nmg:

I don't know - M lives with his two mummies.

garklet:

No, M not got two mummies. M got a mummy and a daddy.

nmg:

No, M has two mummies. Remember, you saw them both at G's house earlier in the year. And you saw them when you went to M's birthday party. And you saw them almost every day when they picked M up from nursery.

garklet:

*upset* No, M got a mummy and a daddy. M not got two mummies. You pooey!

nmg:

I'm not pooey! Not all little boys and girls have a mummy and a daddy; some have two mummies, like M, and some have two daddies.

garklet:

*very upset* NO! YOU WRONG! YOU POOEY! M GOT A MUMMY AND A DADDY! pthpthpthpt!

nmg:

On that we'll have to disagree.

I mean, what else can you do in this situation?

Comments

[andrewducker]

I've just remembered a similar tale from my past.

My father's a doctor, and I apparently had a stand-up argument, aged 4-ish with him and a female doctor, in the hospital, about whether it was possible for a woman to be a doctor. They were maintaining that women could be doctors, I was convinced that a female doctor was a _nurse_.

Needless to say it took a while for my Dad to live that one down :->

[nmg.livejournal.com]

Oddly enough, that was to be the subject of my next post. I had quite a long conversation with him (in which he got really quite upset) in which he was maintaining that women couldn't be doctors, fire fighters, bus drivers, lorry drivers, soldiers (etc, etc - and despite evidence to the contrary), and that men couldn't be nursery workers (the sole male nursery worker at his place left last year), nurses, teachers (!) and so on.

[andrewducker]

I'm fascinated to know more.

I'm not sure precisely when I got over it, but clearly I did at some point. I wish I knew more.

[bohemiancoast.livejournal.com]

For both of these, you see, we had almost none of this with either of ours. And I think that's probably because living in the wild heart of East London, life is so obviously and spectacularly diverse in so many ways that we're more often likely to have the conversation in reverse...

Offspring: J has a pet dragon.
Mummy (distracted): oh really?
Offspring: He keeps it at his other mother's house.
Mummy: Oh, right. J has a pet dragon who lives with his Other Mother. Like in Coraline. I get it.
Offspring: No, not like in Coraline. J's other mother lives on X street.
Mummy: And I suppose the dragon heats their radiators, right?
Offspring: No, mummy, don't be silly. It's like a Komodo dragon, only smaller. And it's going to have babies soon.

...which led to me, later, having a lengthy conversation about breeding captive lizards with J's other mother.

Offspring: I want to live in a pub. Then I could drink lemonade and eat crisps whenever I want.
Mummy: Don't be silly; you can't live in a pub.
Offspring: Why not? A lives in a pub.
Mummy: No he' doesn't... [worries...] does he?
Offspring: Yes he does; it's the Pig and Whistle on x street. His parents manage it.
Mummy: [quickly recovering ground] But A doesn't get to eat crisps and drink lemonade whenever he wants, does he?

[nmg.livejournal.com]

I am reading these and hearing Offspring Minor's voice...

[bohemiancoast.livejournal.com]

Oh yes. Offspring Major and I have quite different conversations, mostly including some phrase along the lines of
- You think?
- Don't you know anything?
- Were you ever actually a teenager?
- I hate you absolutely and forever!
- Plllllleeeeease will you help me with my violin practice?