Heteronormativity ahoy

[nmg]

Scene: I was taking the garklet for a haircut, and we happened to pass a church that was ringing for matins. He asked why the bell was ringing, and misheard 'matins' as the name of one of his friends who moved to Cambridge last year (who I shall refer to as M). The important thing to note is that M is the child of a lesbian couple.

garklet:

Where M?

nmg:

M's in Cambridge.

garklet:

Why M in Cambridge?

nmg:

Because his mummies got jobs in Cambridge.

garklet:

What about him daddy?

nmg:

I don't know - M lives with his two mummies.

garklet:

No, M not got two mummies. M got a mummy and a daddy.

nmg:

No, M has two mummies. Remember, you saw them both at G's house earlier in the year. And you saw them when you went to M's birthday party. And you saw them almost every day when they picked M up from nursery.

garklet:

*upset* No, M got a mummy and a daddy. M not got two mummies. You pooey!

nmg:

I'm not pooey! Not all little boys and girls have a mummy and a daddy; some have two mummies, like M, and some have two daddies.

garklet:

*very upset* NO! YOU WRONG! YOU POOEY! M GOT A MUMMY AND A DADDY! pthpthpthpt!

nmg:

On that we'll have to disagree.

I mean, what else can you do in this situation?

Comments

Re: *Developmental psychology hat on*

[kludge.livejournal.com]

My father told me that one of the most important things he learned when he was at university was that you can't change someone's mind during an argument, because an argument when it's happening is a kind of fight, and people are defensive and entrenched then - the only people who learn to relax during arguments and philosophers and lawyers, because it's part of their job.

The best you can hope for is to make your point and know when no more information is being exchanged. Then you get out, and let your point of view stew in the other person's head. They often come round, but only later, when the pressure is off.

Re: *Developmental psychology hat on*

[clarehooper.livejournal.com]

I like this point.

Re: *Developmental psychology hat on*

[professoryaffle.livejournal.com]

This is certainly how I work, I can very rarely see the other side during an argument but I try at least to consider someone elses point after and potentially change my view point on that basis but during, quite difficult to do that

Re: *Developmental psychology hat on*

[ias.livejournal.com]

As indeed Alex did a couple of days later (as we drove past the same church).

Re: *Developmental psychology hat on*

[surliminal.livejournal.com]

the only people who learn to relax during arguments and philosophers and lawyers, because it's part of their job.

That's hilarious. Also total uber geeks. It does explain a lot tho. I will post the photo I just took in Whitby shprtly :-) (you will understand this is not a non sequitur whenyou see it..)